"I know him best," Steve echoed, feeling like right now, he didn't know him at all. But that was because of the Soldier, he knew - when Bucky had reappeared, he had been the same old Bucky, Steve's best friend, the only family he had left, and it had been harder and harder each time he'd been ripped away.

However, Sam's words did manage to break Steve out of his thoughts, even just for a moment. He glanced at Sam, frowning slightly, feeling like... no, Sam didn't have to tell him this. But if Sam felt it was important for him to know -

"Sam - I'm sorry," he said, moving so that Sam wasn't just holding his hand, but Steve was holding Sam's, back. "I'm sorry, I've been - kind of ignoring you," he finally managed. "And you've... you know exactly how I feel." Only... maybe not exactly, because Bucky was here, not dead, but Steve had thought Bucky was dead, and that was at least sort of the same thing. Similar, at the least. "I have nightmares where I see Bucky fall from that train, over and over," Steve said quietly. "I can remember it perfectly - I can't forget it." He physically wasn't capable of forgetting it, not now that it was etched into his super-soldier-enhanced memory. "I can't... I can't do that to him again. I've got to try to bring him back. At least give him the choice. Because living in a cell... that's not living. Not for Bucky, and not for that Soldier, either." He paused, adding - this time with conviction - "I think if it came down to that, we'd both rather he be dead."

But only if it actually came down to that. And he prayed it wouldn't.

"Nothing is ever easy," he said. "Nothing worth having. It's always hard. That's - okay with me. I've never been one to take the easy way out." He smiled, just a little, finally, at Sam. "I'm sure you know that by now."